Surgery

Well, Tom made it through his knee replacement surgery in good form. He ended up having a partial, which should hopefully make recovery time a little shorter. He's not the best patient, but he's tolerating it. Twice daily physical therapy, constant poking and prodding, having his left leg in a contraption that's meant to keep it moving, nurses and doctors coming in and out all hours of the day and night for both him and his roommate- a nice man by the name of Matt Corcoran. I told him yesterday he had no business being in the hospital- he should have been out standing on the parade route! So, Tom is doing as well as can be expected.

Sam's handling it pretty well. He's been around to play with old friends Lucas, Lauren, Ryan and Kayla this weekend, so I could get to the hospital and actually visit with Tom. I brought Sam over twice for brief visits. Tom's room is literally the size of a postage stamp. It's barely large enough with all the stuff in it for an able-bodied person to move around in, let alone someone with a huge cast-like thing on his leg, with a walker, being aided by a physical therapist. So Sam being in such a cramped space with all those bells and whistles was not the best scenario. He expressed to me tonight that he was sad because he wants dad back. I was glad to hear this because his usual thing is to be attached to me at the hip and not be as attuned to dad. Indeed it does seem strange around here without Tom.

I find I'm enjoying the clearness of my schedule. Because we were so not sure of what the operation and recovery would entail, I purposely didn't make any committments for the next couple of weeks that couldn't be changed. I may make a habit of this. It seems nice to have few plans, other than sticking close to home. I think it will help Sam get back on a more secure track schedule wise as well. I was thinking today about how things were when I started this blog about a year ago. It's nice to be feeling better about a lot of things- Sam and his school situation, and Tom finally hopefully getting some relief for the pain he's had all these years.

Mush!

Even though there were a few bumps in the road this weekend (literally!) we accomplished the objective we set out to do- we rode on a dog sled! Just getting to Lake Placid was an adventure this weekend. I've never seen sleet like what was falling up there yesterday afternoon and evening! Things didn't exactly go as planned- Sam had some diffifult moments, starting with us leaving abruptly on Friday as soon as he arrived home from school. He had expected to leave Saturday morning, but we wanted to get a jump on the coming stormy weather. He had a couple of meltdowns on the trip- not wanting to use a quieter voice in a restaurant or hotel room, rejecting any food put in front of him, wanting to watch a TV show that wasn't even on, putting his hands over his ears any time Tom or I said something he didn't want to hear. I find it tough to be patient when we had planned the whole trip just for him and he was finding fault with all of it! I guess we should just be glad that most trips we go on turn out for the best, and we usually do ride out a few storms! The weather was truly horrible- even in a place where they are used to severe winter weather. We put the dog sled ride off until today so the weather had a chance to improve a little. Luckily it did- this morning it was only snowing. We had a nice morning-leisurly breakfast (Sam even ate 1/4 of a bagel!), took another swim in the hotel's indoor pool, packed up and headed for the frozen Mirror Lake. There was no one waiting in line for the dog sled rides (wonder why in the middle of the blizzard!), so Sam got to go around twice- once with each of us. I know he really enjoyed it, and will enjoy telling his friends and teachers in school about it. I supposed that's what its all about. We hear him get excited about trying something, and we want to make it happen for him. I don't want his anxiety about changes in scenery and routine to stop us from helping him to experience things. I just want to be able to better recognize the pattern here- a period of out and out rejection of the activity "No- I don't want to stay over at nana's OR go dog mushing", which leads to a kind of acceptance that it is happening, despite the protests, to a few more meltdowns along the way, just thrown in for good measure to make sure we know he's not giving up without a fight. When we are in the moment, hearing for the millionth time how he doesn't want to do something, it's hard to remember that there is a pattern to all this. And RDI training more often than not just goes out the window! So, while I would not give the weekend a score of perfect 10, I'd have to give it at least a 7. Hey, we did what we set out to do, we got away, we navigated a minefield of bad weather, and we got to go swimming during a blizzard- how cool is that????

Happy Birthday!

How time does fly! Sam's 7th birthday is tomorrow! I can remember pretty clearly the night before he was born back in 2001. It was an exciting and terrifying time for me. The things we've all been through since then I could have never imagined 7 years ago. Back then I was a different person. I feel like I've grown so much more than Sam over the last 7 years! In the beginning, I was so fearful of being a parent. After a while, I grew used to it and started to really love having this wonderful, unique person in my life. As guilty as I sometimes feel for Sam being diagnosed as "late", I'm thankful for the 4 1/2 years we lived in the "normal" world. They made me strong and built me up to be ready for what was ahead. If someone had told me 7 years ago tonight that I would be the mother of a special needs child, I probably would have made a detour to the psych ward when I arrived at the hospital in labor! It all goes to show that there probably is some kind of big plan at work out there, something that guides us to our proper place in life.
I'm also so thankful for the life we have. We are so lucky. Sam is a bright, happy, and fun child. He lives life day to day with no worry about the future. We do that for him. We have so many blessings. I read about the situations that parents of special needs children go through- the fights with the schools, the dirty looks from total strangers (or even their own family members!), the father with 3 autistic girls laid off from his job and it breaks my heart. Tom and I are so lucky to have each other, supportive family and friends, and especially to have Sam. It will be a happy birthday for all of us as we think about the last 7 years and how our lives have been so enriched. I wish I could help those that are not as fortunate as we are, even if it's just to lend a sympathetic "ear". Anyone who reads this and wants to "chat", email me. The door is always open!